I'm not Dr. Schlewitz. I'm Luna Lovegood.

Luna Lovegood
http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Luna_Lovegood

According to the Myers Briggs personality survey, I am an INFP, that is, Introverted-Intuitive-Feeling-Perceiving (you can find out what you are here).  According to some Harry Potter super-fan folks, that makes me most like Luna Lovegood, which I find pretty funny.  The blonde who wanders around dreamily blurting out incoherent things.  Must be why my students don't understand me.

But the Harry Potter site has a much more positive spin, describing INFP folks as

Idealistic, loyal to their values and to the people who are important to them. Curious, quick to see possibilities, can be catalysts for implementing ideas. Seek to understand people and help them fulfill their potential. Adaptable, flexible, and accepting.

I'm okay, and so are you, pineapple.

Yeah, well, these kinds of surveys are designed to make people feel good about who they are, as is.  It is a reincarnation of the 1950s The Power of Positive Thinking, or the 1960s I'm Okay, You're Okay, or the 1970s Passages.  I'm not sure why I'm so resistant to being told good things about myself.  Sure, I have streaks of idealism, and have paid now and then for sticking to my principles.  But I have current of cynicism, and there are times when I have abandoned my principles.  I have tried to understand my students and help them, when requested, to fulfill their potential, but one uncomfortable lesson I've learned about myself over the past few decades is my capacity for disdain.  "Adaptable, flexible, and accepting?"  Like my body, increasingly limited.

I'm listening now to my internal Lutheran voice, the one Garrison Keillor has mimicked so well on Prairie Home Companion.  Introverted?  Just means I'm a snob who can't deal with the masses.  Intuitive?  I guess a lot.  Feeling?  I worry far too much about what others think of me.  Perceptive?  About others, but not myself.

Sorry.  In a poor mood.  A gray, rainy day.  Watched the Giants lose big time to the Broncos, interspersed with depressingly stupid ads of Pepsi, Call of Duty, and various beers.  In the basement, by myself.  Guess I really am INFP.